da' Bucks

No, not the Milwaukee Bucks. I'm talking about my beloved OSU Buckeyes. Great news! I will be able to watch OSU men's hoops again with my head held high. In case you hadn't heard, OSU has landed a blue chipper! Greg Oden, 7' tall center, has verbally committed to play for Thad Matta in the 2006-2007 season (according to CBS Sportsline.com). Sure, he and his high school teammate, Mike Conley, could still go somewhere else since the committment is verbal only, but it is still a good day for the Scarlet and Gray. Hopefully the bright future of the hoops program will make people forget about the O'Brien blunders. (If you're going to pay players, at least make sure they are good enough to win some titles!)

Also, in the news the past few days (at least in Columbus) was our good friend (please sense the sarcasim) Maurice "My Pussy Hurts" Clarett. The story was that he was 'back in school'. The 'school' was the NFL rookie school that teaches rookies how to acclimate into the NFL. There was some interview footage with My Pussy Hurts where he said that the school teached the rookies how to deal with agents, money and the press. Too bad no one ever taught the prick how to deal with following team rules and how not to cry to the media when he doesn't get his way. Well, for some reason, Denver picked up good ol' Mo. I have yet another reason to hate the 'Mile High' Broncos (sorry Woody). Anyways, I still hold out hope that he will suck hard, get stuck on the D squad for the first string defense to beat up on, or get cut and have to play for Bon Jovi in the Arena League. After all of the greif he brought my beloved Alma Mater, he deserves no less.

Back to the football Bucks, I have sent in my order form for my two tickets that I get as an OSU alum. The order form stated that I am getting MSU tickets this year. Of course, it also has fine print stating that the game I get tickets for is subject to ticket availability. I'll probably end up getting Miami (OH) tickets. My dream is that the OSU Marching Band Alumi game (which I can get two tickets for) falls on the second game of the season like it normally does. That means that I would be intitled to two OSU vs Texas tickets as well. How much would that rock? It will probably end up being Miami (OH) though. They wouldn't give up tickets for that game for band alumni.

Meep Meep

I have ushered myself to a new age. The age of high speed internet. I just had Road Runner installed today. To say that it is better than dial up is the understatement of the year. Now, the internet porn just flows through my computer. Just kidding. I never understood the point of paying to see pictures of naked women on the internet when my web cams hidden in the houses of my hot friends lets me look for free. Just kidding aagain. Especially if the FBI is reading this. I have been enjoying the ability to cruise through Ebay pages more quickly and LOVE the lack of sound of the moden dialing and connecting every time I log on. I had to add a security code to my computer though so that the 11 year old can't just get on line whenever he feels like it.

I used my new speed to buy some new poker chips on Ebay. They are pretty neat. Usually chips like this would go for over $100 if you get them at the store, but I was able to get them for less than $50 total. They come in a cool case, which normally would run $30 in itself. Now I just need to get some people over to play some cards.

busy beaver

I actually felt productive yesterday. I decided to get all of my important documents put away in a file cabinet. Great fun, eh? It was amazing how much crap I had all ovwer the place. Paid bills, old mail, old papers....it was bad. Now, everything is in folders and can be found quite easily. I know, you're excited for me.

I also went through all of my comics and separated what I don't want anymore. A list of comics to sell is in my last posting, if you're interested. I'm going to put them all on Ebay and hope to get a few bucks out of them. I'm keeping all of my favorite ones though. I have almost all of the Wolverine comics (at least up until I stopped collecting). It was amazing to me how many different types of comics I own. The cause: cross-overs. Cross-overs are the reason that I stopped collecting. Not directly, of course, but there were so many different cross overs going at the same time that I was going broke trying to keep up. It amazes me that Woody is still able to keep up with his comic sales because of the cost involved. I have Ghost Rider comics because there was an X-men cross over. I have Avengers comics because of a different cross over. I have Spiderman comics because of an X-Force (I think) cross over. They are all good books, but I was more of a fan of Wolverine and the X-teams (X-Men, Force, Factor, etc.). But then, I did exactly what Marvel wanted me to do. I kept buying the comics after the cross over was done. I had a sick addiction. Then, Image came around, They flooded the market with new heros and new teams and new comics with different variations of heros and teams mixed together. And I bought them all. It got to the point that I needed to stop or sell a kidney. I kept up with my favorites for a while, but then I got into Magic, the Gathering collectible trading cards. I just couldn't support both habits. Eventually, my comic buying decreased and finally stopped. Of course, I now have more Magic cards that I could ever use. My next project is to go through them and put my extras up on Ebay. That will be a blast.

Comic Book clean up

So, today I went through all of my comics and separated ones I want to keep from the ones that I would like to sell. I am probably going to post them all on Ebay in the future, probably after we move, but I thought I would put the word out for Woody and maybe he could point some of his comic book friends my direction. I'm really not too sure how much some of these are worth, but I am willing to deal if I can unload them and make a little dough along the way. Woody, maybe you could give me some advice as to how to sell these. Should I try to group them together or sell them individually? I really only kept my favorites, like Woverine, Spawn, and all of the origional X teams (X-Men, X factor, X Force, ect.) Plus I had some really obscure ones that no one would be interested in (Casper, Archie, wierd stuff like that). I'll probably put them on Ebay too, just to see if I can unload them. I'm a little worried about selling my comics on Ebay. I look at what comics are on sale and it looks like no one is really interested in buying old comics. Same goes with Magic cards. I have a boat load that I could sell, but no one seems interested. Well, here's a list of what I have to offer.

To Sell:

doubles:
Gen 13 #2 Storm Watch #19, 22 Spawn #24, 25, 26, &31 New Men #15 Team 7 #3

Marvel
The Pumisher 2099 #1-7 Doom 2009 #1-8 Ravage 2009 #1-10 Hellstorm, Prince of Lies #1-4 Darkhold, Pages from the Book of Sin # 1-9, 11 Morbius, The Living Vampire #1-12 Ghost Rider #26-41 Ghost Rider & Blaze, Spirits of Vengance #1-13 extra #7 Spiderman 2099 #1-11 Nightstalkers # 1, 3-7, 9, 10 Night Thrasher, Four Control #1-4 (full set) Cable 1 & 2 (two part series) Cable #1-3, 16 Transformers, Generation 2 #1-10, 12 Nomad #1? 2-17 The Ren & Srimpy Show #1-2, 4-8 The Awesome Slapstick! #1-4 X-Men Adventures #1-10 Astonishing X-Men #1-2 Amazing X-Men #1 Dead Pool #1 (different Cover), #1-4 Daredevil, The Man Without Fear #4-5 (special ed.?) Daredevil, The Man Without Fear #307-309 The Silver Surfer and Warlock, Resurrestion #1-4 Sabre Tooth #1 The Secret Defenders #1-4 Bishop #1-2 Avengers West Coast #101 Avengers #360, 363, 368, 369 The Punisher War Journal #45, 47 The Incredible Hulk #400 The Sensation She Hulk #50 Iron Man #290Fantastic Four #375 Silver Surfer #75 Morbuis Revisited #2 Night Thrasher #1 X-Men Unlimited #1 Generation next #1 Justice, Four Balance #1,2 Generation X #3 Factor X #1 x Man #1 Weapon X #1 X-Men Alpha #1 Gambit Xternals #1,2 X-Men Prime #1 Midnight Sons Unlimited #1 X-calibre #1 X-Men, The early Years #9 The Age of Apocalypse: The chosen #1

DC
Robin III 1-6 Batman 190

Image
Hellshock #1-4 Backlash #1-10 NewMen #1-15 Cyber Force #1-3 Doom's IV #1-4 Supreme #1-3 The Kindred # 1-4 Brigade #1-3 Brigade, Blood Brothers #1 Savage Dragon #1-3 Shadow Hawk #1-4 Shadow Hawk II #1-2 Pitt #1-6 The Maxx #1, 2, 4 Youngblood #0-4 WildCats #1-4 WildCats Trilogy #1 WildCats #1?? Splitting Image #1-2 Wildstorm rising #1 DeathBlow #1 Tribe # 1BloodShot #1 WildStorm Rarities #1 Team One Stormwatch #1 The Savage Dragon vs. the Savage Megaton Man #1 Deathmate #1 BlackFlag #1 WildStar #1,2 YoungBlood Strikefile #1 Troll Halloween Special #1 War Child #1 Grifter #1 (two of them) Grifter, One Shot #1 Shaman's Tear #1 Darker Image #1 BloodStrike #1 Wildstorm Rising #2 Extreme Sacrifice #2

Dark Horse
The Mask Strikes Back # 1,2

The Plan

After reading everyone's blogs and seeing what fun jobs that everyone has, I have decided that I need a plan. Well, here it is: I'm going to start working from home soon. I'll have the same job, I'll just be doing it from home. Free Road Runner, a computer, maybe even a cable phone line. It will be nice to roll out of bed, wear my hole filled underwear, and go to work whenever I get up. Anyway, since I will save time and money by working from home, I am going to start taking self study classes in the financial services field. Eventuually, hopfully by next year, I will become a financial advisor. Now doesn't that sound exciting. Actually, I think it does. I'll have the potential to make more money and work with more people and quit my job. So, in a few years when youask yourselves, "do I really have enough life insurance?" you can give me a call and I can tell you, "No you don't. give me your money." Seriously though, I am hoping to eventually start my own business, either with Nationwide or as an independant agent. So, that's 'the plan'. I'm starting out small with these self study courses, but after I pass the tests for them, I get a free trip and I will be allowed to put nifty letters after my name. Soon, I will be Eric Rhodes AAPA. The best part is that Nationwide pays for it and I get $100 for every test I pass. Well, I guess the trip is really the best part.

"I am d' Batman"

"Do you have a Batmobile?" "No Bat Cardoba"

I dont' mean to take a page from Woody's book, but that series of quotes popped into my head. I can remember what they are from though. Dr. Demento, maybe. The "I am d' Batman" is supposed to be Tatoo from Fantasy Island playing Batman. Maybe someone can help me out with my documentation?

Anyway, Noah and I went to see the new Batman movie. It was great. Exactly what I was hoping for from one of these movies. Finally!!! I liked The guy that played Bruce/Batman and the rest of the casting was great too. Alfred was dead on, and Lt. Gordon was a good fit too. I can look past Kate Holmes in the movie even though she's a little crazy. Like Woody, I won't go into too much detail, but I will say that the Batmobile was kick ass. It's exactly how I thought it should be. Not too sure why he had to go under the dash to access the weapons though. I would put the trigger on the steering wheel like the radio controls on my car. Scarecrow was done well and the best part is that he didn't die in this movie like the Joker dies in the first movie. It's hard to have movie franchise when you kill off all of the good villans. I'm still pissed that Lucas killed off Darth Maul. Vader should have done it. Anyway, Batman Begins gets two thumbs up from me.

Poker Night

Well, I had a fun night on Friday. I had some work buddies over to play poker. Texas Hold'em, of course. I didn't win the big game, but I really only made one mistake. I was actually doing quite well in the beginning. I hit two full houses and was chip leader for a while. My best hand was when I hit pocket aces. I called the first round of betting since the game was young and I didn't want to scare anyone off. An ace came up on the flop and I was somehow able to keep in my seat. I checked and then called someone else who bet. My acting was AWESOME. I played like I had something, but that I didn't like what I had. Another round of betting after the turn card and I check again. I called another bet someone made and happily went to the river card knowing that I already won the hand. After the river, I checked and then raised big after someone else bet. He called me and I took a heafty pot as I tossed my aces on the table for all to see. I was great! I lost because I started getting cocky after taking a few hands. I got pocket eights and went all in with them (my one mistake). I was called and someone hit a pair of kings on the flop. I guess it's OK though because I won the next game and just about broke even.

poker last night

Well, I got to play some cards last night. Several people I know from work came over for a little but of Texas Hold'em. Good times were had. I made some good chioces and I made some bad choices. Out of the three games we played, I at least won one. It wasn't the big game, but I got a little something back. As usual, cards came to me early. I don't like being aggressive out of the gun, but I really should have been. I drew pocket aces and the flop turned up another Ace and then paired the board. I played it beautifully. My acting was supurb. No one had a clue. I think I had three full houses early in the game. I couldn't get anyone to go in big with me though. Then, like always, the cards get cold. I went all in with pocket eights and was taken out by a pair of kings. It was a dumb play, but not too dumb. The second game was pretty good for me. I was short stack and ended up winning. The worst part about playing at your house is you can'tt leave if you lose early. The best part is that you can walk to you bed after everyone is gone. The best part about playing with co-workers is that you don't feel bad about taking their money. The worst part is hearing them talk trash if they take yours. It was fun though. I got to see my drunken manager fall down my stairs (he won the big game).

I think I'm going to try to make a poker table when I move to a bigger place. I'm thinking it won't be too hard. I'll just need some ply wood and something to make a frame out of. I think I'll make it in two pieces for storage and to make it easier to move. I just hope that my new neighbors are nice and like playing poker.

Movies I want to see this summer:

I haven't been this excited about a summer of move since, well, last summer I guess. If you care, here is a list of movies I want to see this summer and why (in no particular order) :

1. Batman Beginnings - Finally, a Batman movie that doesn't look like it will suck. The first one was good, but with Jack Nicholson as the Joker, it's har to go wrong. It looks like for this new movie, they are going back to the roots of Batman. I know the origins, of course, but I am actually looking forward to more details of how Batman was created. I like the Batmobile concept that they are going with because it looks more like some of the comics that I've read, rather than the Adam West Batmobile that has been morphed into a neon and black nightmare. Woody may correct me about my concept of the Batmobile, but the car in this new movie, to me, is a believable vehicle for a newly born Dark Knight. I just hope that they don't take this new Batman sorty the same direction as the old movies. An for goodness sake, can we take it easy on the Bat Nipples this time. The last Batsuit had pseudo nipples the size of silver dollars. COME ON!!

2. Fantastic four - I never read a Fantastic Four comic (sorry Woody). I was limited by my funds, so I stuck with my favorites, Wolverine, X-Men, and Spawn. I have other comics, of course, but no FF books. I know the background from cartoons on TV and from what I've read in crossovers, but I don't know much more that a comet gave them their powers. One is stretchy, one is invisible, one is hot, and one is a rock. The effects look pretty good and it looks like the casting is pretty good too. The Thing costume looks a little cheezy and fake, but it would be hard to make Det. Vick Mackey walk around in a rock outfit.

Movies I may wait for them to come out on DVD

1. War of the Worlds - I saw the origional movie and liked it. I also LOVE that the radio broadcast version caused panic back in the day. Heck, I even watched the TV show that was out for a while in the 80's. Anyway, the new version looks really good. True, I am getting tired of Tom Cruise and all of his Scientology rigamerole, but he is a good actor. Again, the effects for this movie look good. The only thing holding me back is a question: how many times can a cold really kill a race of superior aliens? Wouldn't you check on the atomosphere of a planet or wear a protective suit if you weren't sure that everything was 100% safe? Who knows, maybe this movie will end differently.

2. There's a new Zombie movie coming out this summer, I think it's called City of the Dead. What can I say, I'm a sucker for a good zombie movie. The new version of Dawn of the Dead release a year or so ago was way better than the origional and Shaun of the Dead was hillarious. Anyway, this new flick looks promising and seems to have a new twist. Instead of being at the biginning of when the dead start to rise, this movie appears to focus on the ending days when zombies roam the plains like bullafo and the last living people are trapped in a walled city. And I bet it will have good violence, good effects, and even some gratuiotous bobbie. They may be zombie boobies, but boobies none the less.

Dont waste your time on:

Jessica and I watched Boogey Man last night. I'l just say that I'm glad that we rented it instead of waisting $19.95 to buy it. It had a few scares, but really was just a cheap knock off of the movie with the scary tooth fairy, Darkness Fall, I think. The plot is almost scene for scene. The ending blew chunks and the effects were bad. If you can rent it for a dollar and you really want to see it, just make sure that you return it on time or else you will kick yourself for having to pay a late fee for that garbage.

Does this make me gay?:

The local movie store was having a pre-viewed movied sale for 5$ each. Am I gay because I bought Mean Girls? My guess would be no because 1. the movie is kinda funny and 2. Lindsay Lohan is HOT. The other girls too. We also for the new version of Dawn of the Dead and a Star Trek Xbox game for $5 each. The game is reted E, so it will probably suck, but since Gabriel started dropping the F bomb and acting like he's shooting everything in the world, I'm not allowed to play M rated games. Darned impressionable youth.

Wel, that's all for today.

Settings update

I updated my settings so that everyone can comment on my blog and tell me how stupid I am. I just wanted everyone to know.

dead mice

I had a mose in my garage. Actually, I may still have one still. A few weeks ago, I saw tiny turds on some shelves in my garage. So, I set two mouse traps. I checked them daily for a while, and one was sprung...... by the 11 year old. Kids can be a pain sometimes. At least he was smart enough not to use his finger to spring the trap. Time passed and I thought that maybe the mice had left. I could hope, right? Then, coming home from work, I walked through the garage and saw a small fuzzy blur. So, I decided to reset the sprung trap and check the other trap that was still baited. Apparently, I should have kept checking them daily. ***The following is graphic and may not be suitable for small children*** The trap that was still set up and baited had worked. Unfortunately, it had worked some time ago. In the trap's grip was a stiff, rotting, pile of dead Jerry. Now, I can deal with dead critters, but I have some trouble with dead, decaying critters. A 'Side Show Bob' disgusted moan escaped my lips. I then grabbed a stick and a trowel and sent poor Mickey to his grave. MY FEAR: If the mouse trapped indeed Was Mickey and Minnie is still out there, what if they did what two mice do and then I'm stuck with a garage full of Mousekateers?? So, I went out and got more traps. The new traps are neat. They don't snap when the mouse tapes the bait. They are sented stickey squares that attract the mouse and then when the mouse steps on it, it's stuck. Believe me. I touched one. I just hope Gabriel doesn't go out into the garage and end up with all four on different parts of his body. It would be a funny sight, but I doubt he would enjoy the experience.

Teen aged hoopties

At what point did it become OK for teen aged girls to dress like prostitutes? My wife, the kids, and I went shopping at Polaris mall today, and it amazed me how much skin girls are showing these days. I don't mean college girls. I mean teen aged, high school girls. When I was in high school, girls wore t-shirts and shorts, but the clothing always covered everything from mid thigh down and the shirts were baggy. Now-a-days, teen girls wear shirts that are cut too low up top and too short at the bottom AND they wear sizes that would fit a ten year old better. And the shorts are riding low and climbing high. Now, I'm as hetero as men come and I like looking at women, but when thirteen year old girls are wearing outfits that make them look like they are ready for their next set on stage at the strip club, it's time to rethink society. If I were a high school boy, I would have a constant woody (no relation to Woody) surrounded by these thirteen going on thirty girls. When I was in high school , the most skin I ever saw was when the cheer leaders wore their little skirts. Oh, and there was that one time swimming at Anne's place when her friend's boobie kept popping out of her top. THAT was interesting. Anyway, I'm off topic now. I'm not a prude. I likes some skin to show. HOWEVER, if I am ever out at a mall and see MY daughter wearing some of the things that I saw today, I think I would drop dead. I think that there should be some law about allowing your young girls out in public dressed like a Brittany back up dancer.

'Comedy' hour

My Blonde Moment: Once, when ordering food from Mark Pi's DRIVE THRU WINDOW, I asked for 'Almond Bonless Chicken TO GO'. I shook my head at my stupidity only to have my blonde moment punctuated by a Chinease woman's voice over the intercom say, "You're at the drive thru window, are you SURE you want this to go?" Not much you can say to something like that. I just scrunched down into my seat, got my food, and left as quickly as possible.

What I think is unfair: Why do big and tall people have to pay more for their clothes? I understand that a double or triple extra lage shirt uses up more material, but doesn't a medium use up more material than a small? It's unfail that bigger people have to pay more because of their size. 'Little people' (midgets if you prefir) don't get refunds for buying their smaller clothes, so why should bigger people be charged extra? In my mind, the only fair way to sell clothing is all the same price, or on a sliding scale. I'd be happier paying $5 more for my shirt if the guy that wears a large had to pay $3 more for his.

Something to think about: If you are a woman, it is perfectly OK to have any size or shape of boobies. Guys don't care. We just are happy that you have them and hope to have a chance to see them. As Ron White once said, "If you've seen one boob, you pretty much want to see them all." Personally, I enjoy big bobbies as much as I enjoy small boobies. To be perfectly honest, they are just an appetizer to get you ready for the main course. Now if you are a man, Mr. Happy had better not be laughable in size. I'm not saying that you need to come at a woman with a butternut squash between your legs, but if a woman has to conduct a search to find your member, chances are this will be the last time this woman searches. I'm not trying to say that women are petty and would dump a man for being small down below. I am just trying to illustrate that small boobie on a woman aren't nearly as bad a a tiny tot on a man.

Question of the day: If girls that go to Catholic or Christian schools are supposed to be all good and chaste, why do they dress them up in those hot little outfits? Now, before you call me a pervert for making this observation, ask yourself this: Do you think there is a stripper alive that doesn't have a school girl outfit in her on stage wardrobe?

curtosy flushes are one thing, but....

I was just in the restroom seeing a man about a horse and while in there, the guy next to me flushed at least four times in under five minutes. DAMN!!! If it's that stanky, or you're poopin' that much, you need some serious medical attention.

Seriously thinking about Sirius

I was just checking out RadioShack.com and the satelite radio stuff that they carry. They only carry Sirius radios, which is ok because if I get satelite radio, I want to be able to listen to Howard Stern (yes, I'm a Stern fan. He makes my dull mornings at work a little less tortureous). Now, I'm not thinking about getting the radio just because of Howard's move to satelite, but if I'm going to shovel out $100 for a radio and $13 per month for service, I might as well get the service that I would listen to more. The thing that got me is that in order to listen to satelite radio, you need to get a radio and an antenna. Plus, if you want it in your car, you need to buy another thing to adapt the receiver to your car. So, you're looking at about $200 before you can even listen to the music. The question I pose is, 'is it worth it'? They do have a boom box that looks like the anntena is included, but I don't think that you can plug it into your sterio at home or your car. Does anyone have satelite radio? How hard is it to set up? Is it really any better than normal radio and CDs? I'll be starting to work from home soon and I think it would be nice to have satelite radio to listen to while I sit at the computer all day. Does anyone have satelite radio?

Children and poker

In case you don't know, three year olds and poker do not mix. Am I a bad dad because I'm letting him play poker with me? Teach him young, that's what I always say. Basically, he's just throwing chips in and telling everyone what every card is on the table. The eleving year old is a little better. I need more friends.

Jess and I went looking at some houses in Hilliard. Nothing too great. Some nice places, but nothing that will work for us. It was amazing, one of the houses we looked at had an open house and it was a huge pig mess. Dirty dirty! If you are trying to sell your house, at least pick up your dirty clothes and spots equipment off of the basement floor. Just a time from me to you. We need someone to buy our house if anyone is looking. We have a great realtor if anyone needs one.

I really have no expectation that anyone will read this. I know I wouldn't if I weren't me. I just write this crap to pass the time a bit. If you do read this, I hope you enjoy.

amature comedy hour

I like to think of myself as a funny person. Those that know me, know that to be completely false. I'll occasionally share some o the crazy thoughts that run through my head in the late hours of the day as I'm drifting off to sleep. Today's topic oral sex and farts. Separately, both are acceptable, but under what circumstances can both occur at the same time? I've put some thought into the topic and here are my thoughts:

Situation 1: You're planning on a one night stand and you never want to see this person again. Is it OK to blast in this person's face while he/she is servicing you special places? The answer is Yes. As long as you are 'finishing' while you toot. You never want to see them again anyway, so hopfully a fart in the face will offend them enough to leave, thus saving you from performing oral on them.

Situation 2: You're dating someone that you want to persue a relationship with and are receiving oral for the first time. Is it ok to toot? NO. You will never see this person again if you give them a flatulant facial while they are performing this service for you.

Situation 3: You're dating someone that you want to persue a relationship with and are receiving oral for the first time. It is the most uncomfortable experience EVER. There is too much slobber and teeth scrapping is involved. Under these circumstances it is perfectly ok to give a blast, again as long as you are finishing (if you are able to). If your partner doesn't know how to perform, do you really want a lifetime of bad oral? Might as well end it here and now. A fart in the face saves you from an uncomfortable conversation and a tearful break up.

Situation 4: You are newly married and are receiving oral from your spouse for the first time after the wedding. Do not, I repeat, do NOT let loose. If you do, the first time will be the last time receiving oral from your new spouse. You'll have to go outside the marriage to get any tongue lovin' after committing that error. And I can garuntee that your spouse will go outside of the marriage after a stunt like that. Also, getting an anullment is WAY easier than a divorce. Don't be suprised if you are asked to sign some legal documents after farting in the face of your new spouse. Especially if it was moist.

Situation 5: Married a long time. It's you anniversary, and you are receiving your once a year enstallment of oral sex. In this case, it perfectly OK to blast away. However, it could generate 2 different responses. 1. If you love each other, your mate will already be used to your nasty habits and will probably even finish you off. If this is the case, be ready to repay the fillatio favor and be fully prepared for a retaliation volley while you are down there. It's only fair. 2. If you "love" each other and are basically going through the motions of marriage for the kids, expect your mate to stopp immediately, leave the house to "pick up something from the store", and run over to their lover's place to talk about what an asshole you are. If this is the case, it's OK because you'd rather be watching the game anyways.

Well, that's what I think about that. I hope you had a good laugh and are able to take home some good solid advice. You are now starting to realize that I'm a pretty big idiot and you may not want to ever read this blog again, right. I'm with you.

how I lost the last Hold'em tourny I was in

I was in a charity poker tournament a few weeks back, playing Texas Hold'em. I was doing pretty well and ended up one of the last five people at the last table. I wan't chip leader, but wasn't short stack either. The down cards are dealt and my pulse quickens as I look at my cards and see 'Big Slick' (that's an ace and a king, for those of you that don't know). My pusle quickens even more as I see the flop: ace, king, ten. I bet big. One person follows me in. As the turn card is flipped over (nothing worth remembering) I figured that I have this hand won and go all in. When my opponent calls me, we show our cards and she flips over a jack and a queen. For those of you keeping score, that means that my two pair of aces and kings was getting the shit kicked out of it by an ace high straight. Needless to say, the river card was NOT an ace or a king. To quote Larry the Cable Guy, "I was angrier than a one legged stipper trying to do a table hop". I was taken from my comfortable position of having several thousand chips to a complete world of poker hell with three hundred chips. The blinds were $150 and $300 and I was sitting on the big blind next hand. Through alot of skill and even more luck, I was able to stay in two more hands, even getting back up to a respectful chip count, but the bad beat I had taken from a few hands ago threw me off my game for the rest of the day. I was fifth place, one place away from taking home some money.

Wow. This Blog thing is easy!

I just went to www.blogger.com and hit 'create blog' Baga Bing Bada Boom, here it is! Not that I really expect anyone to waste their time reading this, but it will help pass the time.