I mentioned a whiles ago that Jessica, my wife, was lucky enough to be gifted a booklet full of Woodrow's Words of Wisdom. In case you haven't know Woody as long as I have, he's basically the same guy now that he was back in highschool. We had some study halls together that we used to create some funny stories with Herb called The Bat Notes. OK, maybe they weren't too funny, but they were creative and Moe seemed to like them. It was perverse stories about Batman (written by Woody) Robin (written by Herb) and The Wolverine (me). It's not important how Wolvie got stuck with the Dynamic Duo, it just happened. Anyway, I am getting away from the topic at hand. I mention the Bat Notes because they had the same type of comedy and the WWWs. It's about 15 to 20 pages of witty advice to help Jessica "be as successful as Jay Leno and not as successful as Bob Craig." Anyway, enough talk up, here are some words of wisdom from Woodrow (aka Woody). I won't write them all down because there ae over 50 and I just don't have the time.
WWW#1 Don't Drown
WWW#13 There is no WWW#13 because 13 is an unlucky number.
WWW#32 50 Watts per channel!
WWW#33 It's a dog eat dog world and I'm wearing Milk bone underwear
WWW#63 What if... everyone in the world farted at once?
WWW#69 Ha Ha Ha ZEX!!
WWW#72 Life is hazardous to your health
WWW#75 What if someone actually laughed at these jokes?
WWW#83 Kinky sex toy!
WWW#89 At BASF, we don't make alot of the WWW's that you read. We make alot of the WWWs that you read stupider.
WWW#110 This is a test. This is only a test. This is not a quiz. This is a test of the Emergency Comedy Broadcast System. If in the event that this was a real joke, you'd be laughing.
WWW#111 Word or the day: Weinerschnitzel. (don't aks me. It's Rinnert's word.)
WWW#125 WOMAN!!!!!
WWW#137 WAH! (another Rinnert word)
WWW#169 One Hundred and HA HA Ha ZEX!!!
WWW#175 Pain don't hurt.
WWW#194 If you show these WWWs to anyone, I will find you and I will kill you.
WWW#206 Hello, I'm Woody. But in a way, aren't we all?
WWW#227 I was an Etch-A-Sketch artist until I realized women had better knobs.
Well, I think that is a large enough dose of Woody for today. I will post a few more WWWs on a later date. I hope that #194 is not true or else Woody may find me and kill me (my wife too). For more of Woody's brand of Tim foolery, check out his blog. It's quick, it's easy, and it's FREE!
Oh yeah OSU beat Penn State. Good game.
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4 comments:
Was not high school the best! I remember stories about Batman. I still even have a handful of various high school notes that we all passed around. The good old days . . . .
Good Times. I had completely forgotten about WWW. In fact I am probably better off having forgotten. Thanks a lot ERIC!
It took me 13 years to forget and things were just starting to turn around for the better. Just like a bad penny, they always turn up.
Oh well, back to the grind. One Thousand and Ha, Ha, Ha, ZEX!
Yep, I was stealing lines and jokes from an early age. :) I think I ended up with almost 900 of these suckers. Have fun typing up all those!
Oh, I'm not planning on typing all of them, just the 'good' ones. Is there such a thing? Ok, my favorites then.
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